When Thomas was told of Christ’s resurrection by his friends, he said, “Unless I see the mark of the nails in his hands, and put my hand in his side, I will not believe.” Some judge the Episcopal Church for being too open to doubters and inquirers, much like they judge Thomas for his supposed lack of faith. They are not wrong that we are a thinking questioning community. They are not wrong that we assume that each of our members is on their own path of thinking and believing, of adding understanding to faith, or adding faith to understanding. We know that life-events can unsettle either your faith our mental understanding no matter how settled you may consider either of those thing….

Very early this morning, with a hearty committed group of St. Paul’s parishioners and others who happened to join us, I greeted the sunrise with a hearty, “Alleluia, Christ is Risen!” The birds were singing all around. As the sun become brighter and brighter, I had to squint and then eventually turn away because the sun simply became too much for me, and I thought, “I’m not sure my heart is as open to the joy of it all as it should be.” My heart too has to squint because it has become accustomed to brooding about the world, its recent problems, and altogether too much death. In the words of the Gospel of Luke, I have become too accustomed to seeking the living among the dead. It does not take long at all for most of us to feel like we know how the world works. It turns out that it is fairly easy in life to think you know what it possible and what is impossible, what tends to happen and what can never happen. I have had five year olds say to my, “Oh, I know all about that.” Yet life is full of surprises because on the whole none of us are as good at predicting the future as we think we are….

According to ancient tradition, Psalm 51 is a psalm of David, repenting of his sins after committing adultery with Bathsheba and having her husband Uriah killed on the frontlines of battle. As such, it is a reminder that even those chosen by God, even those who love God, are in need of repentance. In this interpretation, it reveals David’s deep sorrow at having done wrong, and his desire to turn from sin toward the forgiveness of God and amendment of life.

It’s been a long time since I’ve been to the circus. If memory serves, the last circus performance I saw was the Big Apple Circus in Boston, over twenty-five years ago. I’m not a huge circus fan, especially when animals are involved, because no matter how well they are treated, I know how inhumane circus life is for a creature meant to live wild and free. Of the human performers, one of the most entertaining acts is always the trapeze artists, who swing and glide and soar across the performance space in “death-defying feats.” It seems so effortless, though we know it isn’t. It is certainly elegant and wondrous to see human beings flying through the air in beautiful arcs, catching and letting go of bars, ropes, and each other.

At one point in his happy ministry, Jesus began to teach his disciples that he would go to Jerusalem, was to suffer greatly, be rejected by the elders, the chief priests, and the scribes, and then be killed, and after three days, rise again. Peter, the leader of Jesus’ 12 disciples, takes Jesus aside and explains to his friend that this suffering thing is better avoided. It certainly isn’t something you go looking for. And it tends to find you anyway.… Sounds like the voice of a friend, right? Maybe the world would have been so much better if Jesus didn’t suffer, didn’t die at 33 years old? Oh, the things he might have been able to teach and do if only he had lived! Perhaps we would still have Christianity, but without that ugly cross and all the suffering. Jesus did not hear Peter’s well-intentioned admonition as having anything good about it at all….